Week 2 of the 2024 NFL season almost is in the books, and it was just as screwy as last week.
Big injuries to star players have contending teams on the fritz, while bottom feeders shocked the world with big upsets. Is there cause for concern in San Francisco? Are the Saints one of the best teams in the NFC? Are we discounting the Raiders and Patriots?
Here's where league stands heading into heading into Week 3:
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32. Carolina Panthers (Last week: 32)
Record: 0-2
This team exists solely as an argument in favor of NFL relegation. I wake up on Sunday mornings dreading having to watch them play football.
31. Denver Broncos (Last week: 30)
Record: 0-2
This offense continues to be putrid beyond belief. Their defense keeps them in games but rookie QB Bo Nix just says, "Nah, I'm good."
30. New York Giants (Last week: 31)
Record: 0-2
Malik Nabers is the best receiver Daniel Jones has ever had. He had a breakout game in Week 2, but I fear for his future. Only because of Daniel Jones.
29. Tennessee Titans (Last week: 27)
Record: 0-2
Will Levis can't stop turning the ball over. He's proving to be a major liability.
28. New England Patriots (Last week: 29)
Record: 1-1
Rookie coach Jerod Mayo's squad plays with some fight. As long as Rhamondre Stevenson continues to run the ball effectively, Jacoby Brissett just needs to be average under center.
27. Washington Commanders (Last week: 26)
Record: 1-1
Another solid, turnover-free game from rookie Jayden Daniels, who distributed the ball well to all his playmakers and let Brian Robinson do the heavy lifting on the ground. This is a rebuilding team headed in the right direction.
26. Las Vegas Raiders (Last week: 28)
Record: 1-1
Gardner Minshew diced up a suspect (?) Ravens secondary. It turns out that getting the ball to your two best weapons is a recipe for success. I might have been too harsh on the Silver and Black last week.
25. Jacksonville Jaguars (Last week: 22)
Record: 0-2
This team is quite boring and quite mediocre. Trevor Lawrence is officially on #FraudWatch.
24. Indianapolis Colts (Last week: 15)
Record: 0-2
Me literally last week: "Anthony Richardson is awesome. Continue to unleash him and don't look back." It's a good thing I'm not an NFL coach — yikes.
23. Chicago Bears (Last week: 20)
Record: 1-1
There's going to be a learning curve for Caleb Williams, at least for a few weeks. Fortunately for Chicago, they have the defense to support that. An offensive line? Not so much. Thinking the Bears would shock everyone and suddenly become an 11- or 12-win team in one offseason was premature.
22. Los Angeles Rams (Last week: 11)
Record: 0-2
A shaky defense got shellacked against the Birds. Matthew Stafford might have just lost Cooper Kupp to an ankle injury a week after losing Puka Nacua (knee) and two starting offensive linemen. Is the sky starting to fall in LA?
21. Los Angeles Chargers (Last week: 23)
Record: 2-0
They beat up on a bad team, but this offense still is devoid of pass-catchers. J.K. Dobbins and Gus Edwards are an excellent one-two punch on the ground, though.
20. Arizona Cardinals (Last week: 24)
Record: 1-1
The Kyler Murray-Marvin Harrison Jr. connection is alive and well. Watch out, NFC West.
19. Miami Dolphins (Last week: 8)
Record: 1-1
Tua Tagovailoa's health is of the utmost importance. I'm not sure how they move forward in the weeks to come, but they aren't going to be nearly the same team with Skylar Thompson under center for the foreseeable future.
18. Seattle Seahawks (Last week: 21)
Record: 2-0
They barely squeaked out a win over the Pats. Geno Smith got it done through the air, but this is a different team without Kenneth Walker. Two very easy games to start the season. I'm not buying them just yet.
17. Atlanta Falcons (Last week: 19)
Record: 1-1
It was a slow start offensively, but Kirk Cousins and the offense finally put it together in the second half and showed flashes of their sky-high potential. An impressive upset and the defense looks much improved as well.
16. Minnesota Vikings (Last week: 25)
Record: 2-0
They dominated the reigning NFC champs. Sam Darnold and the boys are officially frisky. A very, very impressive win. Fortunately, Justin Jefferson's injury doesn't appear serious.
15. Cleveland Browns (Last week: 18)
Record: 1-1
This team just feels gross, even when they win. A nice bounce-back game for the defense, I guess.
14. Green Bay Packers (Last week: 17)
Record: 1-1
Malik Willis did just enough and Josh Jacobs did the heavy lifting on the ground. That's the recipe for success until Jordan Love returns.
13. Pittsburgh Steelers (Last week: 12)
Record: 2-0
Justin Fields has played OK in place of Russell Wilson, but this offense needs an upgrade at quarterback. Is DangerRuss still that guy? The defense can carry them until they have an answer.
12. New Orleans Saints (Last week: 16)
Record: 2-0
The offense continued to roll in a statement win over Dallas. Don't look now, but New Orleans might be for real.
11. Cincinnati Bengals (Last week: 13)
Record: 0-2
A step in the right direction against the defending champs. There's no need to worry just yet in Cincy, they will work it out.
10. New York Jets (Last week: 9)
Record: 1-1
The defense is returning to form and Aaron Rodgers got his first win (in a game he finished) in a Jets uniform. R-E-L-A-X.
9. Tampa Bay Buccaneers (Last week: 14)
Record: 2-0
A win over the Lions on the road? Revenge game. They are a good football team. It's hard not to root for Baker Mayfield. Respect them.
8. Buffalo Bills (Last week: 10)
Record: 2-0
They beat the brakes off the Dolphins and their defense seems to be pretty legit. Josh Allen and Co. continue to find ways to get it done.
7. Dallas Cowboys (Last week: 6)
Record: 1-1
They were humiliated by Derek Carr and Alvin Kamara at home. The run game is nonexistent. Dak Prescott can't do it all. Plenty of things to clean up.
6. Baltimore Ravens (Last week: 3)
Record: 0-2
Getting cooked by Minshew and the Raiders after leading by 10 points in the fourth quarter at home? This defense might not be what it was last year.
5. Detroit Lions (Last week: 5)
Record: 1-1
Jared Goff taketh, Jared Goff giveth away. I have a feeling the Lions might not fully live up to their sky-high expectations, but it's still early.
4. Philadelphia Eagles (Last week: 4)
Record: 1-1
It wasn't an explosive game offensively by any means, but Jalen Hurts still is capable of carrying the team on his back without A.J. Brown. However, that defensive secondary still appears to be Swiss cheese. This game was a perfect representation of their 2023 season.
3. San Francisco 49ers (Last week: 2)
Record: 1-1
It turns out Christian McCaffrey is pretty important. Both sides of the ball stunk for most of the game. There's something about playing in Minnesota that haunts the 49ers. A frustrating loss for Kyle Shanahan's squad who usually requires a wake-up call or two every season.
2. Houston Texans (Last week: 7)
Record: 2-0
When C.J. Stroud and the Houston offense struggled, the defense picked them up time and time again. It wasn't a great showing against the Bears' stout defense, but if the Texans have a defense ... look out.
1. Kansas City Chiefs (Last week: 1)
Record: 2-0
Never, ever, ever bet against Patrick Mahomes with the game on the line. "Burrowhead" is a thing of the past. Nobody's knocking off the champs right now.